Asshat by Association

Posted on June 1, 2011


Warning: Long and relatively nasty rant incoming. Thou hast been warn’ed.

There’s a reason I greatly dislike associating myself with any kind of group, club or subculture. Since Sloan said it best, I’ll just quote them:

“It’s not the band I hate; it’s their fans.”

I love being Primal and considering myself such. However, I despise no small number of others who announce the same affiliation.

Mark’s recent blog post, The Blame Game, attracted the usual suspects in the comments, both good and bad. I, personally, was seeing a lot of bad, though. (And it was a great article, as most of his are.)

Someone do me a favour and remind me to do something totally and spitefully fuck’tarded should I ever become popular on ye olde Internet so I can ostracize myself from huge chunks of my readers/fans, because it’s a sad fact that Sturgeon’s Law (“90% of everything is crap”) applies to people.

It makes me wonder if Mark ever questions writing his posts at all. (He’s certainly wise to steer fucking clear of the forums!) I’m sure he puts a lot into his articles; it feels to me as though he does, anyway. They’ve got heart, personality, but are also peppered with excellent references. Then, after all that work, and in soliciting the goodwill of the community he created, what does he get? Comments from shitheads, asshats, r’tards, fuckwits and plenty of other compound words. (Or at least that’s how they paint themselves via their comments.) Interspersed amongst them, almost as if to accentuate the crap sandwiching them, are kind and thoughtful sentiments and comments relevant to the actual content of the article being commented on.

By the way, I include in the above-mentioned compound-word categories all the inane comments like “My heart is all aflutter from this amazing article! OMG! Primal is like so much better than everything in the world! SAD raped my father and murdered my relatives! I literally cry to think of everyone who isn’t as enlightened as I am, being all Primal and such!! Aren’t I right?! Someone reply to this comment and tell me how right I am so I can feel like my life’s worthwhile!”

I should note that it’s not MDA; the site is actually better than most. It’s the world, more or less, and the Internet simply amplifies the stupidity. I wish I could be more of an optimist, but I encounter such idiocy every day. After a while, it becomes difficult to deny the anecdotal evidence: People suck and I want very little to do with a good many of ’em.

Anyway. My point is that most people who associate themselves with groups that non-affiliates see as being filled with asshats end up being asshats themselves simply due to association, despite their best intentions to remain non-ass’ularly related. It sucks, but I suppose it’s the price to be paid when something becomes popular.

Don’t believe me? When someone tells you they think every girl should read Twilight because it’s sooooo gooooood, what’s the first thought that pops into your head?

Exactly. Sadly, we have a double-association to rid ourselves of: First, most people think we’re all caveman re-enactment morons/lunatics, and second, we have the Sturgeon Law member issues I’ve already covered above.

So. . . way to help people out and change lives, Mark. You jerk. Next time, come up with something ridiculous and niche that only seven people want to be in on. I bet those seven people would be sweet-wicked-hawt-awesome-cool. . . like Obi Wan-Jesus-Old Spice Guy. May I suggest the Lite-Brite Blueprint? I call shotgun being among the seven! No douche-backs —- errr no take-backs!

Fellow asshats, sound off in the comments and justify my existence!